THREE WEEKS AGO, OUR FAMILY WENT INTO A HUGE STRUGGLE IN OUR FINANCES. WE HELPED A RELATIVE FINANCIALLY AND WE DIDN’T EXPECT THAT IN THE COMING DAYS, WE WILL RUN OUT OF MONEY. IT IS IN THOSE MOMENTS I SEE GLIMPSE OF HOPELESSNESS AND HATRED FOR MY RELATIVES WHO HAD BEEN DEPENDENT ON US FOR A LONG YEARS. IT EVEN CAME TO A POINT WHERE MY MOTHER AND I FIGHT OVER THINGS LIKE HELPING OUR RELATIVE FOR LONG YEARS NOW, WHERE IN THE EARTH WE WILL GO TO GET MONEY FOR OUR DAILY MEAL, TRANSPORTATION AND THE LIKES. THERE WAS A FIRE OF HATRED BURNING IN MY HEART FOR OUR RELATIVE. FOR ME, HELPING PEOPLE IN NEED IS AN ACT OF KINDNESS AND BEING A CHRISTIAN, I SHOULD BE LIKE JESUS. I AM TOO CLOUDED WITH HATRED. I WANT THEM TO STOP RELYING ON US. IT WAS NOT OUR FAULT THAT THEY ARE A LARGE FAMILY WITH MORE THAN 8 KIDS. IT WAS NOT OUR FAULT THAT THEY ARE SUFFERING NOW. WE, MY FAMILY, ARE SUFFERING TOO. BUT WE MANAGED TO SURVIVE. IF WE CAN, THEY CAN TOO. I KEPT ON PRAYING, DAY AND NIGHT, ASKING GOD TO HELP ME AND EVEN ASKED FOR FORGIVENESS FOR CURSING OUR RELATIVE. I HAVE SAVINGS BUT I AM NOT PRETTY SURE IF IT CAN SUSTAIN US UNTIL THE END OF THE YEAR. CONSTANT PRAYERS. I EVEN DO FASTING. I STILL FEEL BAD AT THEM AND I OPTED TO JUST INCLUDE THEM IN PRAYERS. I DON’T WANT TO HAVE FIGHTS WITH MY MOTHER IN THE FIRST PLACE. SO HERE COMES NOVEMBER 19, 2013… I GOT A CALL FROM MY SISTER, MAE. MAE: HI SIS! YOU HAVE A MAIL AND I’M SORRY IF I OPENED IT. THERE IS AN URGE IN ME, I DON’T KNOW WHY. ME: NO, IT’S FINE. WHAT IS THE MAIL ALL ABOUT? IS IT MY PHONE BILL? LET ME GUESS, FOR A FUCK**G SAKE, A LETTER FROM OUR AUNT BORROWING MONEY FROM US AGAIN? ARGH! MAE: NO, SIS. DON’T GET SHOCK. DON’T YELL. SIS… YOU JUST WON! *SCREAMS* OMG! *SCREAMS* ME: WAIT, WHAT? STOP SCREAMING. I DON’T UNDERSTAND A THING. DID YOU JUST SAY I WON? I WON A WHAT? A CAR? HOUSE AND LOT? WHAT? I DON’T NEED THOSE. I NEED MONEY! MONEY! MAE: YOU WON 8 THOUSAND. SIS, GIFT CERTIFICATES. ME: *STILL TRYING TO PROCESS WHAT I WON* I DON’T NEED THAT! I NEED MONEY. MAE: SIS, THIS IS EQUIVALENT TO MONEY TOO. SINCE IT IS FROM A SUPERMARKET, WE CAN HAVE NOW FOOD FOR OUR CHRISTMAS EVE. ME: *ENLIGHTENS* AND WE CAN BUY NOW OUR TOILETRIES AND SNACKS THAT WE CAN STOCK ON OUR REFRIGERATOR. WE CAN EVEN BUY A SACK OF RICE! MAE: YES, SIS. YES. *CRYING* ME: THANK YOU LORD! THANK YOU LORD! *SOBS* WHEN GOD BLESSES US WITH ANYTHING, HE INTENDS FOR THOSE BLESSINGS TO SPEAK OF HIS GOODNESS. GOD OWNS EVERYTHING, AND THE FACT THAT HE HAS BLESSED US IS A TESTIMONY TO HIS LOVE. IF YOU ASK THE LORD TO REVEAL ANY REASONS WHY FINANCIAL BLESSINGS ARE BEING WITHHELD, OR REASONS WHY YOU’RE GOING THROUGH SOME THINGS YOU’RE GOING THROUGH, GOD WILL SHOW YOU. OBEDIENCE, REPENTANCE AND GENEROSITY TOWARDS OTHERS UNLOCK HIS HAND. LORD, THANK YOU FOR ALL THE BLESSINGS AND GRACE THAT YOU HAVE GIVEN TO MY FAMILY AND TO ME. YOU ARE TRULY A FAITHFUL GOD. MY FINANCES ARE IN CRISIS AND ARE CAUSING ME GREAT PAIN. BUT YOU HEARD MY PRAYERS. FATHER GOD, YOU ARE THE SOURCE OF ALL MY SUSTENANCE. THANK YOU. “I ALONE KNOW THE PLANS I HAVE FOR YOU, PLANS TO BRING YOU PROSPERITY AND NOT DISASTER, PLANS TO BRING ABOUT THE FUTURE YOU HOPE FOR.” – JEREMIAH 29:11-13 (GOOD NEWS TRANSLATION) JEALOUSY AND ENVY ARE EMOTIONS WE ALL FEEL FROM TIME TO TIME. BUT IF THEY ARE ALLOWED TO BECOME DOMINANT IN OUR LIVES, THEY DELAY OUR GROWTH TO SPIRITUAL MATURITY. ENVY IS DEFINED AS “A FEELING OF DISCONTENT AND RESENTMENT AROUSED BY ANOTHER’S DESIRABLE POSSESSIONS OR QUALITIES, ACCOMPANIED BY A STRONG DESIRE TO HAVE THEM FOR ONESELF.” SCRIPTURE REMINDS US, “PEACE OF MIND MAKES THE BODY HEALTHY, BUT JEALOUSY IS LIKE A CANCER” (PROVERBS 14:30). I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT SOMETIMES IT’S HARD TO UNDERSTAND WHY GOD DOESN’T ALLOW THINGS TO HAPPEN STRAIGHTAWAY. PINES AND ADAM WERE MY CLASSMATES FROM TRAINING FOR VICTORY WAY BACK IN 2011. HERE IS THE PHOTO OF US. PINES WAS MY BEST BUDDY THAT TIME. ADAM WAS A FAMILIAR FACE AND I THOUGHT HE WAS ONE OF OUR CHURCH’S CAMPUS MISSIONARIES. THEY WERE MY FRIENDS UNTIL NOW. I AM BLESSED TO HAVE THEM AS MY FRIENDS. LIKE MANY OTHER EMOTIONS, ENVY IS A SYMPTOM OF UNDERLYING ISSUES THAT NEED TO BE RESOLVED. HARBORING ENVY KEEPS US FROM SEEKING AND TRUSTING GOD AND WORST, IT BLOCKS US FROM SEEING THE BLESSINGS OF GOD. FEW WEEKS AGO, ENVY ROOTED IN MY HEART. I SAW PINES AND ADAM’S ACHIEVEMENTS, YEARS AFTER WE GRADUATED. PINES IS NOW VERY ACTIVE IN PREACHING GOD’S WORD IN VICTORY BATANGAS. SHE BECAME A GOOD LEADER. SHE EVEN WENT FOR A 10 DAYS MISSION, WHICH BY THE WAY I WANT TO EXPERIENCE TOO. ADAM BECAME MORE A MIGHTY MAN OF GOD. HE STILL CONTINUES TO SHARE GOD’S WORD THROUGH HIS BLOG. NOT SO SURE, BUT I THINK HE WILL GO TO THE NATION AND REACH OUT TO THE LOST. I FEEL ENVIOUS. WE WENT TO THE SAME CLASS IN THE SAME YEAR BUT I WAS LEFT OUT. THEY ALREADY SAVED A HUNDRED OF SOULS NOW. I WAS SO DEPRESSED AND BLAMING MYSELF FOR WHAT HAPPENED TO ME. THEN TWO AMAZING THINGS HAPPENED. I SHARED MY SENTIMENTS TO MY VICTORY SMALL GROUP BOTH IN VICTORY FORT AND MAKATI AND I RECEIVED A LOT OF RESPONSES BUT KC’S MESSAGE WAS SOMETHING. HERE IS HER TEXT MESSAGE: HI ATE ANA :) Y SAD? U’V BEEN DOING GREAT THIS PAST FEW WEEKS. U’V BEEN CHANGING A LOT! IN FACT, I ENVY YOU.. THE WAY YOU SEE THINGS, THE WAY YOU REACT, DEAL OR RESPONSE ON WHAT’S HAPPENING IN UR LIFE… CIRCUMSTANCES AND TRIALS UR FACING. ANG GALING MO KASI KADA MAGSHSHARE KA SA AMIN, RAMDAM KO UNG INCREASING FAITH MO, YUNG GOD’S GRACE.. :)) I LIKE THE WAY YOU SEE THINGS. YOU SEE IT POSITIVELY PALAGE. UR LEARNING EVERY TIME MAY NAEENCOUNTER KANG TRIALS. :) AND EVEN NAKAKADEPRESS UN SITUATION, UR STILL ABLE TO SMILE. LAHAT NAMAN TAYO MAY KANYA KANYANG PINAGDADAANAN RIGHT NOW. :)NORMAL SIGURO NA MAFEEL MO YAN. WAG MO LANG PAGSTAYIN COZ IT WILL BRING NOTHING ON YOU AND DEMONS WILL WIN PAG NAGPADALA KA. IPAGPRAY MO LANG AND PANGHAWAKAN UNG PROMISES NIYA! :) *BIG WARM HUG TIGHT!* EVERY THING HAPPENS FOR A REASON! :) MAY PLANO SIYA SAYO. ;) SA KINGDOM NI GOD LAHAT TAYO PANTAY PANTAY :) WALANG LABIS, WALANG KULANG ANG PAGMAMAHAL NIYA SA ATIN. IKAW AY NANDIYAN SA KUNG ANO KA NGAYON, BE THANKFUL.. KASI MERON IBA, NI HINDI SYA NAKIKILALA.. UR LUCKY ENOUGH ATE ANA! :* AFTER READING KC’S TEXT MESSAGE, TEARS ROLL DOWN MY FACE AND I STARTED PRAYING. I ASKED GOD FOR FORGIVENESS. THE BIBLE TELLS US THAT ENVY IS A PRODUCT OF OUR SINFUL HUMAN NATURE. GOD IMPRESSED IN MY HEART THAT HE HAVE A GOOD AND PERFECT FOR EACH AND EVERY ONE OF US. HE PROMISED THAT. IT WAS WRITTEN IN THE BIBLE. I WOULD LOVE TO GO SHARE THE GOSPEL AND ADVANCE GOD’S KINGDOM BY GOING ON A MISSION THE WAY MY FRIENDS, PINES AND ADAM, DID. I’VE EVEN TRIED TO AND BY GOD’S GRACE I WAS ABLE TO SAVE ONE SOUL – NHING, ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS. BUT I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO REACH PINES AND ADAMS’ ACHIEVEMENTS. NOT NOW. NOT YET. I NEED TO IMMERSE MYSELF IN GOD’S PRESENCE AND DELIGHT IN HIM. I NEED TO RELIGHT THE FIRE IN MY HEART FOR HIM. SOON. I KNOW IT WILL HAPPEN SOON. SO, I HAVE A CHOICE: I CAN RESENT PINES AND ADAM’S SUCCESS WHEN I COMPARE IT WITH MY FAILURE, OR I CAN ACKNOWLEDGE THEIR SKILLS AND BE AMAZE ON HOW GOD’S BLESSED THEM. GOD HAS PROMISED TO GIVE US THE DESIRES OF YOUR HEART, BUT IT MAY TAKE A WHILE FOR THOSE DESIRES TO COME TO FRUITION. IT WAS WRITTEN IN PSALM 37 AND IT SAYS, "TRUST IN THE LORD AND DO GOOD; LIVE IN THE LAND AND BE SAFE. SEEK YOUR HAPPINESS IN THE LORD, AND HE WILL GIVE YOU YOUR HEART’S DESIRE. GIVE YOURSELF TO THE LORD; TRUST IN HIM, AND HE WILL HELP YOU; HE WILL MAKE YOUR RIGHTEOUSNESS SHINE LIKE THE NOONDAY SUN." GET RID OF ANY FORMS OF ENVY TO EXPERIENCE JOY AND CONTENTMENT. HAVE FAITH THAT JESUS BRINGS BLESSINGS THAT WILL BLOSSOM BEAUTIFULLY AND FRAGRANTLY IN OUR LIVES IN HIS PERFECT TIME. "HEAR INSTRUCTION, AND BE WISE, AND REFUSE IT NOT. BLESSED IS THE MAN THAT HEARS ME, WATCHING DAILY AT MY GATES, WAITING AT THE POSTS OF MY DOOR. FOR WHOSO FINDS ME, FINDS LIFE, AND SHALL OBTAIN FAVOR OF THE LORD." – PROVERBS 8:33-3
MANY OF US LONG TO HAVE SUCH FAVOR AND BLESSING FROM GOD. GOOD NEWS! GOD IS FAITHFUL IN DELIVERING TO US HIS PROMISES. THE LORD WANTS US TO BE BLESSED (DEUTERONOMY 28:1-14.) IN ADDITION, ISAIAH 1:19 ADVISES US THAT “IF WE ARE WILLING AND OBEDIENT THAT WE WILL TASTE THE GOOD OF THE LAND.” DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO BECOME A CHANNEL OF GOD’S BLESSING? IT MEANS GOD IS USING YOU AS AN INSTRUMENT OR VESSEL WHERE HE CAN SERVE HIS PURPOSE. FOR AN EXAMPLE, GOD WANTS TO PLANT A CHURCH IN THIS PARTICULAR CITY IN ORDER TO REACH FOR THE LOST PEOPLE. FOR THIS TO HAPPENED, GOD WILL USE A PERSON TO MAKE THIS HAPPEN. I AM CERTAIN THAT GOD WILL SPEAK TO YOU AND IMPLANT IN YOUR HEART THAT THIS IS THE MINISTRY HE WANTS YOU TO DO. GOD IS A GENEROUS GOD. HIS NATURE IS TO GIVE. SO GOD WILL SUPPLY EVERYTHING YOU NEEDED – MANPOWER, MONEY AND TIME. IT WAS KNOWN TO EVERYONE MY STRUGGLE IN LAST MONTH. IT WAS LIKE I CAME OUT FROM THE DARK TUNNELS OF LIFE BITTER BUT NOW BETTER. SO I WAS NOT PREPARED ENOUGH TO REACH OTHERS SINCE I WAS STILL RECONNECTING AND RENEWING MY RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD. HOWEVER, GOD IMPRESSED IN MY HEART THAT I AM MATURED ENOUGH AND HE WILL BE WITH ME. SO HERE COMES THE WONDERFUL EXPERIENCE. UNEXPECTEDLY, MY COUSIN NAMED LOURDES, WHO USED TO BE MY FAITHFUL PLAYMATE WHEN WE STILL KIDS, SENT ME A FACEBOOK CHAT MESSAGE LAST NIGHT. IT WAS A NORMAL HI AND HELLO CONVERSATION NOT UNTIL SHE ASKED ME FOR INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES. SHE SAID SHE HAS BEEN STRUGGLING WITH HER FAITH IN GOD ALONG WITH HER RELATIONSHIP WITH HER CO-WORKERS. SHE TOLD ME ALL THE DETAILS AND GAVE HER THE POSSIBLE ADVICE USING GOD’S WORD. WE TALKED ABOUT PRAYER, THE TRUTH, HOW TO DEAL WITH SINS AND WHAT GOD AND THE ENEMY WANTED FROM US. HERE IS THE SCREEN SHOT OF THE LAST MINUTE BEFORE WE END THE CONVERSATION. OF COURSE, I ENDED IT BY PRAYING FOR HER. I WAS BLESSED FROM THAT EXPERIENCE. IT WAS UNEXPECTED SINCE WE HAVE NOT TALKED FOR THE LONG TIME. WHEN I VISITED OUR PROVINCE LAST APRIL OR MAY THIS YEAR, I WAS NOT ABLE TO MEET HER BECAUSE I DO NOT HAVE TIME. BUT GOD MADE IT IN A FASCINATING WAY. I BELIEVE COUNTLESS TESTIMONIES WILL BEAR TO THIS EXPERIENCE. LET US STRIVE TO BLESS THE WORLD WITH THE BLESSINGS GOD HAS GIVEN US. DO YOU TO BECOME A CHANNEL OF GOD’S BLESSINGS TODAY? THESE PAST FEW WEEKS, AFTER MY BREAK UP WITH MY EX-GIRLFRIEND, RHAI, THERE WERE DAYS WHEN I SIMPLY CRY OVER ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING AND COMPLETELY TERRIFIED AND HORRIFIED. SOME DAYS I WAS ABLE TO PAINT A SMILE AND GO ON WITH LIFE AS IF NOTHING IS WRONG.
TRIED TO HARM MYSELF BY NOT EATING, DRINKING LOTS OF ALCOHOLIC DRINKS AND WORSE, KILLING MYSELF. WELL, ALMOST. BECAUSE EVERY TIME I TRIED, I HEAR A VOICE AS IF SOMEONE WAS IN FRONT OF MY EAR TELLING ME NOT TO DO IT. I KNOW WITHOUT A SINGLE SOLITARY DOUBT THAT IT WAS GOD SPEAKING TO ME THROUGH HOLY SPIRIT. EVERY DAY, GOING TO WORK, I ALWAYS SEE THIS BILLBOARD SIGN IN EDSA BONI WITH A BIBLE VERSE, “…BUT THOSE WHO SEEK THE LORD LACK NO GOOD THING.” WHAT A POWERFUL WORD! THAT VERSE JUSTIFIES THE WORD IN MATTHEW 6:33, “BUT SEEK FIRST HIS KINGDOM AND HIS RIGHTEOUSNESS, AND ALL THESE THINGS WILL BE GIVEN TO YOU AS WELL.” EVERY DAY I ASKED GOD TO ENLIGHTEN ME ON WHAT HE WAS TRYING TO TELL ME. UNTIL LAST WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 9, GOD GAVE ME AN ANSWER. I HAD THIS REVELATION FROM GOD. BEFORE I MET MY EX-GIRLFRIEND, I WAS A VERY DEDICATED AND ACTIVE CHRISTIAN IN OUR CHURCH. I WAS REALLY ON FIRE. BUT I SWAY AND WALK AWAY FROM GOD AND HIS RIGHTEOUSNESS. I KNOW IT WAS THE ENEMY’S GOAL! THE DEVIL WILL MAKE EVERYTHING TO GRAB SOMEONE AWAY FROM THE LORD. AND NOW THAT I LET THE ENEMY WON, I AM SHATTERED AND BROKEN. BUT GOD’S GRACE IS NEW EVERY DAY. I BELIEVE IN MY HEART THAT GOD WILL USE THIS TIME IN MY LIFE FOR HIS GOOD AND HAVE ALREADY SEEN SOME TREMENDOUS BLESSINGS COME FROM IT. HE TRULY IS SO GOOD TO ALLOW ME TO SEE THOSE BLESSINGS. HERE ARE SOME OF THE SWEET BLESSINGS I RECEIVED FROM GOD. 1. OMFLIT BOOKS. I JOINED THEIR SOME KIND OF ESSAY CONTEST AND I WON CHILDREN’S BOOKS. CLAIMED IT AT THE 34TH MANILA INTERNATIONAL BOOK FAIR IN SM MOA LAST SEPTEMBER 14, 2013. 2. SILENT GRACE. I SAW THIS POSTER SAYING THEY WILL BE HAVING AN AUDITION FOR A SHORT FILM ENTITLED “SILENT GRACE.” THEY ARE IN NEED OF DANCERS WHO CAN DO SIGN LANGUAGE. I AUDITIONED LAST SEPTEMBER 21, 2013 WITH THE THOUGHT THAT I WILL JUST DANCE. BUT I WAS WRONG. I HAD A VTR AND THEY ASKED ME TO ACT WITH SIGN LANGUAGE. I GAVE AND DID MY BEST AND DIDN’T HOPE THAT I WILL BE CHOSEN. BUT LAST OCTOBER 9, I RECEIVED A TEXT MESSAGE THAT I AM PART OF THE MOVIE AND WILL BE PLAYING THE ROLE OF ONE OF THE DANCERS IN REDEAFINE DANCE GROUP. 3. TEGAN AND SARA PHILIPPINES FANDOM. I LOVE MY FRIENDS FROM THIS FANDOM. WE ARE NOT JUST SHARING OUR LOVE FOR TEGAN AND SARA BUT MORE THAN THAT WE SHARE OUR LIFE TO ONE ANOTHER. MY CLOSE FRIENDS FROM THIS FANDOM HELPED ME TO REALIZE THAT I DESERVE TO BE LOVED AS A GIRLFRIEND AND PARTNER AND NOT AS A REBOUND. 4. CRUSHES. HAHAHA! YES! SOMEHOW THEY HELPED. I CONSIDER THEM AS BLESSINGS FROM GOD. THANK YOU ALFRED, ADAM, ANNIE AND BINEY. 5. SMALL GROUP – VICTORY MAKATI AND VICTORY FORT. THEY ARE MY EVER LOYAL AND LOVING FRIENDS SENT BY GOD. THEY NEVER CONDEMNED ME BUT THEY ACCEPTED ME. THEY ARE MY PRAYER WARRIORS, MY LIFE GUARDS AND MY COUNSELORS. THOUGH MANY TIMES I LEFT THEM FOR MY SELFISH REASONS, THEY ARE STILL THERE. BLESSINGS MAY COME IN FORM OF MATERIAL OR NOT MATERIAL THINGS. WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING, THAT’S A BLESSING. YOU STILL HAVE SOMETHING TO EAT, THAT’S A BLESSING. I AM AMAZED, HUMBLED AND MORE GRATEFUL THAN I COULD EVER POSSIBLY EXPLAIN. GOD HAS SHOWN ME EVERY SINGLE DAY HOW MUCH HE LOVES ME. NOW, I FULLY UNDERSTAND WHAT HE MEANT IN THE VERSE. I DRAW AGAIN CLOSER TO GOD AND HE DRAW NEAR CLOSE TO ME. I SET HIM AGAIN AS MY TOP 1 PRIORITY AND LIKE WHAT HE PROMISED, HE WILL PROVIDE EVERYTHING. I AM AT PEACE NOW AND THERE IS A SPARK ON MY HEART. I HOPE AND PRAY THAT THIS TINY SPARK WILL LIGHT UP AND UNTIL I CAN NO LONGER CONTAIN THE PRAISE AND WORSHIP FOR MY GOD. I KNOW THE DAYS AHEAD WILL BE HARD. IN FACT, THEY WILL SUCK. BUT I ALSO KNOW WHAT GOD PROMISES. AND HE IS ALWAYS FAITHFUL. HE WILL HELP ME TO RISE UP AGAIN. I HAD A HEART-FILLING ENCOUNTER WITH GOD TODAY. IT STARTED WITH MY BOSS TEXT MESSAGE. GOD SPEAKS TO ME THROUGH A TEXT MESSAGE.
FROM THE DAY I KNEW I AM MODERATELY DEAF, I DESIRE TO STUDY SIGN LANGUAGE. MY INTEREST IN DEAF PEOPLE AND SIGN LANGUAGE STARTED WHEN I WATCHED “DINIG SANA KITA” MOVIE AND BEFRIEND WITH THE LEAD ACTOR, KUYA ROME. FEW DAYS AGO, I INQUIRED IN PHILIPPINE SCHOOL OF DEAF ABOUT THEIR FILIPINO SIGN LANGUAGE CLASS. THEIR OFFER WAS QUITE EXPENSIVE SO I OPTED NOT TO ENROLL THIS YEAR AND SAVE MORE MONEY SO I WILL HAVE ENOUGH NEXT YEAR. YESTERDAY, I RECEIVED AN EMAIL FROM DE LA SALLE – COLLEGE OF SAINT BENILDE ABOUT THEIR FILIPINO SIGN LANGUAGE PROGRAM. AND IT STIRS THE FIRE IN MY HEART TO PURSUE STUDYING THIS YEAR. I PRAYED TO GOD FOR GUIDANCE AND A HEART OF UNDERSTANDING FOR MY MOM. EVER SINCE, MOM AND I ARGUED ABOUT THIS. SHE THINKS THAT STUDYING SIGN LANGUAGE WAS JUST A WASTE OF TIME AND MONEY SINCE I CAN STILL HEAR. BUT MY RESPOND TO HER WAS ALWAYS “WHAT IF I CAN HEAR NOTHING. HOW CAN I COMMUNICATE WITH YOU? THROUGH PEN AND PAPER ONLY?“ SECRETLY, WITHOUT TELLING MY MOM, I DECIDED TO ENROLL THIS YEAR. ON MY WAY TO SCHOOL, I TEXTED MY BOSS, MS. ANNA. I TOLD MY BOSS THAT I WILL BE ABSENT TO WORK TODAY BECAUSE I WILL ENROLL. SURPRISINGLY, MY BOSS DIDN’T GET MAD. SHE JUST ASKED WHAT SCHOOL. AND HERE IS WHERE GOD INTERCEDES. ME (TEXTING UNCONSCIOUSLY): DE LA SALLE, MAAM. I WILL STUDY FILIPINO LANGUAGE. EVERY SATURDAY, 4 HOURS, FOR 3 MONTHS. I REALLY WANT THIS, MAAM. I CAN EXPLORE A LOT WITH THIS SKILL. I CAN REACH AND SHARE GOSPEL TO THOSE DEAF PEOPLE IF I HAVE THIS SKILL. I SELDOM SEE DEAF PEOPLE GOING TO CHURCH JUST BECAUSE THEY FEEL THEY DON’T BELONG. MS. ANNA: THAT’S VERY COMMENDABLE. I’M PROUD OF YOU. GOD BLESS! IT DAWNED ON ME! GOD IS SPEAKING TO ME. ALL THIS TIME MY GOAL IS TO STUDY SIGN LANGUAGE FOR MY FUTURE. BUT GOD HAS OTHER PLAN. I BELIEVE HE PROVIDED FOR ME AND HE IMPRESS IN MY HEART THE WILLINGNESS TO ENROLL TODAY BECAUSE HE WANT ME TO ADVANCE HIS KINGDOM. IT REVEALED TO ME THAT GOD WILL USE ME TO REACH THE DEAF COMMUNITY. THE LINE “I’M PROUD OF YOU.” IN MY BOSS’ TEXT MESSAGE IS ALSO A MESSAGE FROM GOD, MORE THAN ANYBODY ELSE, HE IS PROUD OF ME. I AM THANKFUL TO MY BOSS, MS. ANNA, FOR BEING SO UNDERSTANDING AND FOR THE ENCOURAGEMENT. GOD FAVORED ME! I ALREADY TOLD MY MOM THAT I AM ALREADY ENROLLED AND SHE SMILED. I WOULD LIKE TO EXTEND MY GRATITUDE TO KUYA ROME, VANIE (MY BESTFRIEND), NHING AND RUANN FOR ALL THE ENCOURAGEMENT AND FOR ALL THE COMPLIMENTS. IT’S AMAZING HOW GOD TALK TO ME IN AN ‘EXTRA-ORDINARY’ WAY AND HE CHOOSES MY BOSS. LORD, MAKE ME A HOLY VESSEL FOR YOU SO THAT WHEN PEOPLE LOOK AT ME, THEY SEE YOU IN ME. FILL ME WITH YOUR HOLY SPIRIT. THANK YOU FOR THE REVELATION LORD! I LOVE YOU! I AM OFFICIALLY ENROLLED NOW. :) IMAGINE YOUR LIFE WAS LIMITED. IMAGINE YOU HEAR NOTHING. I BET YOU WILL FREAK OUT AND ASK GOD “WHY ME, LORD? WHY?”
WHEN I FIRST TELL PEOPLE I’M DEAF, THE MOST COMMON REACTION I GET IS PITY. ”I’M SO SORRY,” THEY TELL ME. WHEN I TELL PEOPLE I AM STUDYING FILIPINO SIGN LANGUAGE, THEY ASK “ARE YOU DEAF?” IT WAS REALLY FRUSTRATING! I AM MODERATELY DEAF; IN FACT I CAN STILL HEAR SOUNDS AND NOISES OF THIS WORLD. I HAD HEARING AIDS BUT I SELDOM WEAR THEM. I AM CURRENTLY STUDYING FILIPINO SIGN LANGUAGE AT DE LA SALLE – COLLEGE OF ST. BENILDE AND I AM A STUDENT OF FSLLP BATCH 68. WE STARTED OUR CLASS YESTERDAY, JUNE 8, AND I HAD FUN. I MET A LOT OF HEARING AND DEAF PEOPLE. THE UNIQUE THING ABOUT OUR CLASS IS THAT OUR TEACHERS ARE DEAF. ON OUR ACTIVITY YESTERDAY, I GOT 2 VERY GOOD’S. WE TRIED TO COMMUNICATE TO OUR DEAF TEACHERS WHO ACTED LIKE PEOPLE WORKING IN JOLLIBEE, IN A HOTEL AND IN A CLINIC. WE COMMUNICATE TO THEM THROUGH GESTURES AND SIGN. IT WAS FUN! I ENROLLED IN A FILIPINO SIGN LANGUAGE BECAUSE I WANT TO COMMUNICATE WITH DEAF PEOPLE. I WANT TO SHARE THEM THE GOSPEL AND LET THEM KNOW WHO JESUS IS. I WANT TO LAUGH WITH THEM, PLAY WITH THEM AND MAYBE CRY WITH THEM TOO. PEOPLE MAY BE DISGUSTED BY THE IDEA OF BEING DEAF OR MAYBE DON’T UNDERSTAND IT BUT PLEASE DON’T PITY US. DON’T FEEL SORRY FOR US. MANY PEOPLE DON’T REALIZE JUST HOW DIFFICULT DEAFNESS CAN BE. IT IS A HIDDEN DISABILITY, AN ISOLATING DISABILITY. WOW! IT IS ALREADY JUNE! GOSH! TIME FLIES SO FAST AS THEY ALWAYS SAY. I SUDDENLY THOUGHT OF MY FAITH GOALS. INDEED, I AM BLESSED THAT THE LORD HAS ALWAYS LOOKED UPON MY “FAITH GOALS” WITH FAVOR. THERE WERE THINGS ON MY FAITH GOALS THAT DIDN’T HAPPENED AND I AM THANKFUL THAT IT DIDN’T. THERE ARE MANY TIMES THIS YEAR THAT I DO GET FRUSTRATED AND DISAPPOINTED BECAUSE MY LIFE IS ON TRACK AND I FEEL LIKE GOD WAS SO DISTANT FROM ME. BUT LOOK, AS MY TESTIMONY SHOWS, GOD IS GOOD AND FAITHFUL. LISTING MY FAITH GOALS AND SEEING THEM ANSWERED BY GOD INCREASES MY FAITH IN HIM. EACH FAITH GOALS IS CAREFULLY THOUGHT-OUT AND PRAYED FOR. AND HERE MY FAITH GOALS FOR 2012. I CROSSED OUT THOSE THAT HAD BEEN GRANTED AND ANSWERED BY GOD IN HALF A YEAR. PERSONAL FAITH GOALS 7. MOVED-ON ON MY PAST RELATIONSHIP. I MUST SAY IT WAS NOT REALLY EASY. BUT THE HARDEST PART OF MOVING ON IS NOT FOR YOU TO FORGET THE PAIN BUT IT WAS WISHING AND PRAYING FOR YOUR EX-PARTNER’S LIFE. 8. TRUE HAPPINESS IN GOD’S PRESENCE. HOORAY FOR THAT! MY CAREER 4. MORE SOCIAL MEDIA RELATED FREELANCE JOB. I AM THANKFUL THAT I GOT 2 EMPLOYERS WHO ARE VERY KIND TO ME AND THEY MADE ME PART OF THEIR TEAM. MY MINISTRY 2. ONE TO ONE WITH SOMEONE. HOORAY! I AM HAPPY BECAUSE GOD PROVIDED SOMEONE WHO I CAN LEAD AND HE EQUIPPED ME WITH HIS HOLY SPIRIT. 5. SALVATION OF MY FRIENDS – NHING. YES! NHING, ONE OF MY BEST BUDDIES FOR 9 YEARS, ACCEPTED JESUS CHRIST AS HER LORD AND SAVIOR. 6. ADVANCE GOD’S KINGDOM THROUGH TUMBLR. YES! IT WAS ONLY HALF A YEAR BUT GOD HAS BEEN SO GOOD TO ME. I RECEIVED A LOT OF ENCOURAGING MESSAGES ON TUMBLR AND ON WORDPRESS. SOME OF MY FAITH GOALS ARE NOT ANSWERED YET. STILL, I AM GRATEFUL AND THANKFUL BECAUSE GOD HAS BLESSED ME BEYOND MY FAITH GOAL LIST. BROTHERS AND SISTERS, THIS IS A TESTIMONY OF GOD’S GOODNESS AND FAITHFULNESS. FAITH GOALS ARE PLANS OR OBJECTIVES THAT ARE ROOTED IN FAITH. IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO CONCEIVE AND ACHIEVE IT WITHOUT GOD. THANK YOU JESUS! THANK YOU GOD! :) HAVE YOU SEEN PEOPLE ON STREET CORNER WITH SIGNS “REPENT. JESUS IS COMING.” OR “REPENT NOW. THE END IS NEAR.“? IT OFTEN BRINGS FEARS ON OUR MIND.
HAVE YOU TRIED DRIVING IN A ONE WAY STREET? THAT IS FOOLISH AND DANGEROUS. WHY DRIVE ON A ONE WAY STREET ANYWAY? OUR LIFE WAS LIKE THAT. WHETHER OUT OF REBELLION OR IGNORANCE, WE ALL DRIVE IN THE WRONG DIRECTION THAT WILL LEAD TO ETERNAL SEPARATION TO GOD. WHEN WE SIN, WHEN WE GO AGAINST GOD’S WILL, IT IS LIKE WE ARE GOING ON THE WRONG DIRECTION. UNTIL WE HAVE A PERSONAL ENCOUNTER WITH GOD, WE CAN TURN AROUND AND GO ON THE RIGHT WAY WITH HIM THAT IS WHAT REPENTANCE MEANS. REGARDLESS HOW BAD WE ARE OR HOW FAR AWAY WE ARE FROM GOD, WHEN YOU TURN AROUND TO HIM (REPENT), WE WILL INSTANTLY FIND GOD’S LOVE AND FORGIVENESS. REPENTANCE INVOLVES
LET US ALL GO TO THE NEW DIRECTION. THE BIBLE TEACHES THE LORDSHIP OF JESUS CHRIST. JESUS REFERRED TO AS “LORD” 747 TIMES IN THE WHOLE NEW STATEMENT. LORD MEANS MASTER, THE ONE WHO MAKES THE DECISION, INDICATING THAT HE IS THE DELIVERER GOD HAS PROMISED TO SEND. JESUS IS LORD.
THE LORDSHIP OF JESUS CHRIST MEANS HE HAS ABSOLUTE CONTROL OVER YOUR LIFE. NOW WE KNOW THAT JESUS DIED ON THE CROSS FOR YOU AND ME AND SAVED US FROM ALL OUR SINS (SALVATION), OUR RESPONSE SHOULD BE MAKING JESUS THE LORD OF OUR LIFE. SUBMIT TO HIS LORDSHIP ALL AREAS OF OUR LIFE. SUBMISSION TO JESUS AS LORD IS THE START POINT OF CHRISTIAN LIFE. CONFESS THAT JESUS IF LORD (ROMANS 10:9) WE SUBMIT TO HIS LORDSHIP WHEN WE CHOOSE GOD’S WILL OVER OUR OWN. LORDSHIP DEMANDS OBEDIENCE AND REPENTANCE. ANYONE WHO CLAIMS JESUS AS THEIR LORD IS EXPECTED TO DO WHAT HE SAYS. REMEMBER WHAT IS WRITTEN INLUKE 6:46 AND MATTHEW 7:21? WE SHOULD DENY OURSELVES AND SURRENDER TO HIS WILL. THAT’S OBEDIENCE. LORDSHIP IS ALSO A MATTER OF HEART. LORSHIP IS NOT A ONE-TIME DECISION. IT IS THE CONTINUOUS DECISION TO OBEY GOD IN EVERY AREA OF OUR LIFE. IF IS GENUINE, IT WILL BE MANIFEST IN YOUR ACTIONS WHICH BEING OBEDIENT INCLUDES. LET US ALL MAKE JESUS THE OVERALL MASTERS OF OUR LIVES, IN EVERY AREA. |
AuthorA moderately deaf pluviophile with a little penchant for books. Conqueror and co-heir with Christ since February 27, 2010. ✝ Categories
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